The Best Way to Make and Keep Friendships in Adulthood

Today's blog post is based on an article from The Art of Manliness:

It’s a common lament: making friends in adulthood is hard. After college, it can seem quite difficult to form the kind of tight relationships you enjoyed as a youth and develop not just a network of causal acquaintances, but a circle of real friends. 

Researchers have found that there are three keys for overcoming these difficulties and creating close friendships: 1) proximity (being geographically/physically close), 2) repeated and unplanned interactions (getting together without planning to get together), and 3) a setting that encourages vulnerability. 

There’s one practice that satisfies all three requirements, and arguably represents the best way of cultivating satisfying friendships in adulthood: starting a discussion group.

3 Advantages for Friendships in Forming a Discussion Group

A discussion group may take the form of a book club, a Bible study, an entrepreneurial mastermind, or an organized bull session built around any other theme. Regardless, such groups not only offer edification to your mind, but three great advantages when it comes to making and keeping friends:

1. Sidesteps the planning go-round.
2. Ensures consistent hang-out.
3. Encourages deeper conversation.

I belong to a free business mastermind group that meets on the first Wednesday of every month, called A Leg Up. I try to make at least some of their meetings (and I've presented once). This group used to meet in person at Fuddruckers in Modesto but (at least for now) it meets online via Zoom. Be sure to check out the Meetup link above...they're meeting in two days and since they're virtual, you don't even have to be in Modesto!

How to Start a Discussion Group

• Choose a theme.
• Choose a schedule.
• Invite potential members.
• Have a de facto facilitator.
• Incorporate (a bit) of structure/tradition.

If you'd like to start your own group, the article has ideas on how to get started. Or if you'd prefer to join an existing group then check out Meetup. But if you're in business then check out A Leg Up. Their theme is business and they have a monthly speaker share an aspect of business. They have a set schedule. I'm inviting potential members right now. Kimmer Sue and Clayton Dosier are the facilitators. Although I don't know if they have any traditions yet.

So, if you're free for (virtual) lunch on Wednesday, be sure to check them out. I still need to make arrangements at work for the day off, but plan on seeing me there.

Interesting days

Today - Trail Mix Day, Overdose Awareness Day, We Love Memoirs Day and Love Litigating Lawyers Day

September will be Sepsis Awareness Month, Friendship Month, Sourdough September, Chiari Awareness Month, Read A New Book Month, Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month, Pulmonary Fibrosis Awareness Month, Suicide Prevention Month, Shake Month, Sewing Month, Childhood Cancer Awareness Month, Hunger Action Month, Happy Cat Month, Honey Month, Chicken Month, Piano Month, Preparedness Month, Library Card Sign-up Month and Mushroom Month

Tomorrow - Building and Code Staff Appreciation Day, Tofu Day, Ginger Cat Appreciation Day, Letter Writing Day, Emma M Nutt Day and Cherry Popover Day

Next Monday - World Duchenne Awareness Day, Mouthguard Day, Beer Lover’s Day, Superhuman Day, Buy a Book Day, Salami Day and Acorn Squash Day

September 31 - You get a day off from Interesting days